Updates:)

And so its life, Recently I've turned 19, many things happened n for all the things that has happened, Allah i'm grateful for everything. The girls in school made a mini-celebration which i appreciate much but seriously too rushing for me and therefore i give those idiotic black face and i admit. Thanks for making a last minute celebration. Fadz bought me a Necklace and a pair of earrings which is Tiffany & Co. Thanks Honey i appreciate so the very much. Its rare for a guy to buy such an expensive gift and i dont even wanna use it for school. But i will use it for Sis wedding. Miss chong and the rest made a celebration for  me too, thanks for the gift and prezzies. I don't really bother abt gifts but thanks anyway. Danny, Daniel, angie and jackie thanks for the Club ticketss!!! haha will go like a soon together ya! And my family brought me to PS cafe, it was awesome thank you very much:) I'm so grateful bcos it only on birthday i get to see the whole family gathered together.

Just in case you think i have forgotten you, NOT at all honey P. I miss you, i began to understand slowly why you left and i never ever blame you for that. I miss you badly and i have been having strange dreams lately, but to put that Aside, i'm 19 like finally. The saddest thing was for 6 consecutive years we have been celebrating each other birthday with a Slammed and A great Bashed but this year no one ever manage to be a great organiser like you!. I'm sad and i was permanently thinking about you. You always cross my mind. You made me bolder. You made me wiser. I love you with all my heart besties for federation.

Oh yes Honey P, my sis getting married on 3rd July 2011. amazing or what, she's finally getting married to the guy who is with her for 9 years. I'm elated for her and let's hope that her relationship is everlasting. I have an awesome brother in law:)

Apart from that i will moved on to studies, how's is it lately?
PROJECTS. Well this time is harder and i see so many conflicts in class which is ultimately annoying. I don't get why people are pushing living thing to the corner and drive them nuts. Everyone has feelings and attitude and sometimes we show it at the wrong time. Assumptions makes an Ass of You and me so never assume. Somehow my classmates is so disappointing. They're still back in 2004 where they took their PSLE and i reckon is time for people to be at 19, to use their thinking cap wisely and work with whoever that they're suppose to. After all LP has one Common goal which is to succeed and go poly's right? But how come like that ah? haiz. Complete and Submit, is it so hard.

I hope i can make it to Poly's like seriously. Allah pls guide me to the correct path. Till then Adios Amigo!:)

You + Me = FADZ IDA

Updates

Yes, so finally i get to meet up with Suen, Munyee, YZ, TZ, Liling :) love this girls...though is a short hangout i'm pleased to see how my friends succeed in their studies and taking up hobby or even a new skills. I'm happy for them. And finally i got a Job at robertson quay @ the merry men Kitchen+Bar. Have fun working there, colleagues are so so but not too bad la, i like the bar guy cos he's nice, humble and chef's are also nice there. Bad news i worked just infront of Mr Koh house:(

This holiday i shall say is meaningful as i was about to end this holiday i think there's is much to improved. I'm glad that some of my friends make a remarkable improvements on their GPA, and it only make sense cos they worked hard for it. For those still struggling always remember that's a light at the end of the tunnel. Perseverance is the key word.

Jas, Cheryl and Sob found job at Coffee Club, happy as they find and earn money during the holiday, unhappy when i see them eat instant noodles during their super short breaks it really breaks my heart. Heartless company:(

Fadz and me been having a rocky relationship, i know how awful it is ending a relationship. I shall not mention bout it, i'm sorry if i really hurt your feelings.



You + Me = FADZ IDA

Job:)

So back to holidays...awesome or what. I was currently helping my sister in her project and i finish up her history project already. Now i'm done. Wed is my interview for Mega Zip and Friday is for SDC. I hope to ace either one of the interview. I don't pinned hope on interview just hope i am convinced enough to prove it to them. Laure has kindly agreed to accompany me, thanks Laure. Tmr is P birthday, i'm feeling really sad that you're not here with me if not i would have certainly planned all the surprises for you. Haiz i'm uber sad and i just wish i can pour my woes to you. Each time i blog and post i will definitely cry thinking about you. I will be visiting you tmr honey, so wait up for me okay. Got to go for now. 

You + Me = FADZ IDA

Its holidays

I'm grateful and relieved that exams are over! weehees...so now i can hibernate and sleep all day long. Hmm not really, i don't really like to sleep too long also.
Still planning what to do for holidays,my holidays get abit bored without you. In fact, it really makes me bored.
I was planning to go for picnic? haha that's so silly of me?
hmm how about swimming? oh well i can always swim anytime i want?
Escape theme park? haiz so far and rides are limited?
USS? so expensive?

Seriously i don't know what to do during morning, holidays just started and i feel so bored. Guess  i'll just have to find a job. IMY p. If only you will come back, that will be my greatest birthday wish ever. For now. that's it. I hope to see some good results soon. Ta ppl!

You + Me = FADZ IDA

2 weeks passed

2 weeks passed, sorry readers i'm very emotional in my blog, hmmm yes you left 2 weeks already. I'll remember every monday. Its the day you left me, i was happy that i managed to talk to you for 2 hours on that last friday. I'm coming again this friday so be patient abit ya p. I miss you badly. Everyday, every minute, every hour i start thinking about you and how awesome you are as a friend. This is a song for you honey P, you know i'm taking my exams next week and i'm so nervous you know. I just hope i get to do well and you want to know something? i did well for OFA, and i'm quite happy about that. I know honey P you want me to do well everytime and in whatever i do. And honey P you must be really happy to hear this, the day you passed on, coach asked me to takeover you position and this is my medals to you. The gold is for you honey. Hope you are happy with it.


I got a song dedication, remember we used to sing this song during the old days, i cried if i heard this song. But you know i'll do anything for you.

Love you P
I miss you P
I hope you're doing okay on the other side
You + Me = FADZ IDA

Exams:(

Firstly its been 11 days since you left me, i'm going to visit you tmr. I'm happy about that, its feels like meeting you finally. I began to accept the fact slowly that you left me. Thanks Lijun, Jass, Fadz, Mun yee, Suen for your encouragements. I'm trying.

P, this sat is the Muay thai Finals, I hope to win for you. I'm doing it for you. I know how strong is our opponent but imy honey. You deserve this, i shall win it for you. I will do it for you. 11 days without texting you, its like talking to the moon but there was no response. I miss you like crazy again. Sometimes i stayed up late thinking its been a while, but its like a year. Here a funny thing P, on that day i suddenly came to think about you and i wanted to text you out to go out with me and then i told Fadz, "fadz hey faster eat, i'm going to go P house later and meet her later" Fadz:" huh?! What?! P house? Honey she left, you forgot? Pls accept the fact. See how much i miss you. I'm so obsessed to meeting you. Its like it never came across my mind this thing has happened. I'll spent my time with you tmr, but P it won't be that long cause i got to rushed off for Muay thai in the afternoon.

Hmmm...this happened all to fast. P i just took my OFA paper and it was hard but i managed to finish it all. 7 march is my exams, after exams fadz bringing me to pulau ubin just to unwind. I need it and i hope you'll understand. And also pls look after my friends and family. Allah pls help me to do well in my exams and make sure my friends have a smooth sailing time doing their examinations.

P, i will end here for now. I got to go. Mum's calling me and i have to study right now. I visit you tmr honey. In a mean while, i'll be thinking about you.








You + Me = FADZ IDA

Farewell my best best buddies:(

It was a sad Valentine for me, the reason why i am updating on this blog its because i don't ever want to forget this 14 feb day. Never Ever..you left me on this day and i shall not mention your name. The thing is i'm just worried if you will be fine alone, i don't mind joining you but dear i have my responsibilities n i hope you truly understand abt it. P....i love you...5 years of good friendship how can i forget that....but the question is why so fast? why do you have to leave me so fast? I'm so sorry that i didn't want to follow you that night. If that night i follow you., this wouldn't happen. I just had to blame myself. Your bf grievance was horrible and so was I. We all love you honey, you're a talented lady with a cool knowledge of everything. P......i'm writing to you cos i miss you, i love you, its indescribable. A day without you is like a year. Sometimes at this particular hour, i was waiting for you to text, but i know you want me to move on. I'm going to prove to my parents that i can do well for exams. I need your guidance, everywhere i go i feel you, infact i'm happy about that cos i know i have company which is you.

Sometimes deep inside i just wonder if anybody can replace your spot...till now none. But i'm grateful i got friends who are really concern towards me esp Lennard, Isk, Fadz, Lenny, Nan, Su En, Mun yee, Muzna,Jas,Jazz,Amsyar and many more. I hope you help me to watch them over and blessed them with good things. I could still remember the times where we joke and laugh like there is no tomorrow, the times when i fall down and i could rely on you to help me get back up. The times when you gave me those huge surprises. But you know one saddest thing in life is, i don't get to celebrate my 19 birthday with you. This are the things that i'm longing for someone to take over. But i just need you. Every night i couldn't sleep, i'm waiting for you to hold my hand, i'm waiting for you to bring me to your dream.

I've always been talking about you to my friends, why so sudden? taking you away from my life brings me my most weakest points, emotional breakdown, traumatize, and many more. You are my life, you light my life, you give me hope, you give me strength to carry on, you motivate me, you cheer me up, you drown my sorrows, you make me like your sister, you bring me to your family. Now its gone p....... why? why?
I pray for you, i pray for you that you rest in peace, i pray for you that you find joy on the other side, i pray for you that you will be fine on the other side, i pray for your soul, i pray for your kindness, i pray for your family.
I LOVE YOU.
I MISS YOU.
I MISS YOU LIKE CRAZY.
I WISH YOU WERE HERE.
I WISH YOU HELD MY HANDS.

Honey P.....pls take care of yourself as i wont be there with you. I just wanna see you, hold you, touch you, feel you. You will always be in my heart forever and ever. Nothing can replace you. You will be my best i ever had. Thank you for everything. I will miss you forever.















You + Me = FADZ IDA

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Firstly Happy new year to everybody! Okay i know i kept this blog dead bcos i'm too busy for anything.'

Had a blast yesterday with the crazies. Went off @ 9.30 to meet phyone and then SHOPPING ON NEW YEAR EVE IS THE BEST SHIT! Went shopping @ Orchard Ion and then P.S till 5 then went to meet the fabulous chio bu's @ newton for DINNER! Dinner's awesome! Then head to HEEREN for B&J's! Yeah staffs over there like to stereo type! Too much Stereo on their ears perhaps. Oh wattever! Then head to flea market! Phyone and Fadz guess what?! I bought Ray Ban for $10.00 so not me! Hahaha... my previous ray ban cost $168.00. shit me. We head to MBS after that, chilled lepak, merepek, cakap kosong, camwhore and watch KATY PERRY !!! Haha. i mean fireworks! Had loads of fun plus its so tiring talking to gwneth! That crazy little evilious girl. Okay i'll let the pics do the explanation how i felt yesterday

I miss you load FUZZY come back fast honey:)

You + Me = FADZ IDA

love is so crazy and scary!!!

I have yet to get any off day for this week so looks like night life DUH!...went out yesterday night to TGIF after work. Sickening i have yet to go shopping!!!Went with Jackie and Laure!!! Eat till full then head to Harry's. Went to unwind. loves to sit down and talk to them. And!! i can't wait for Fuzzy to go out from hospital, this monday he's discharge!!! I swear i feel so fking awesome by then, feeling down. He is the only on can turn it up. I'm grateful for having fuzzy as the special person...hearts...like....lovee one and only you. Today work was SHIT, my body's been having this painful thingy but i managed to overcome this painful sharp pain. Haiz cannot Angss. Went out to Oosh, i managed to escape early from Work and JOYCEE is back, she bought this beautiful handphone keychain from BKK. Awesome and Thanks i appreciate it.

This week have been a dreadful one, so many things happened at a flash of time. I despise it but whom am i to stop all this. Maybe a lesson to be learn. I need holidays badly to just throw away the bowlines i had.
Human change but i've read in the book that is not wrong for human to change, everyone has their rights rite? somethings are just so hard to let go like the one that you love, the one whom you held hard when you need them, to see them gone just like that, how hard to face life, but he once told me not to be sad when your love one leave you cause god love them more than you and you have to take it positively cause everyone will leave this world one day, i'm scared when that time comes and i'm not prepare. I won't cry because i want you to leave happily. I miss you a lot. Indescribable is the word to mention to you. I love you for all the work that you helped my family i'm grateful for the effort, love, sacrifices that is priceless. Sometimes i got to learn the hard way to realise one mistake, my apology for that. Love you, Miss you badly. Its only 5 days you left but it feels like yesterday. I pray for you.

Friends- Nyom Nyom. There's no better or other way to go to school and enjoy joking and make friends along the way. I love the period where we all enjoy and laugh, it been quite a while since i did that. I hope this continues. From that incident, i learnt that i must love those who are still here and are those whom i met most of the time. Forgive and forget. I learnt that and i feel like i'm making use of my life properly. I hope things will work out right.

You + Me = FADZ IDA

Weekends BURNED

Fuzzy went into accident but thank god, he's fine. Due to that he cannot drive for 3 months. I hope things get better. I'll always pray for you dear.I shall not elaborate on it caused i'm feeling upset and remorseful about it.Therefore public apology i cannot make it to NAN'S deepavali open house. And i broke a promise. So sorry Nanthini. I was so so caught up during the weekends, visiting him off and on @ NUH. Fuzzy you looked cute with ur Pyjamas and you still can laugh about it.

So as usual went to work, nothing much happened, Michael last day today, so i brought him some gift and a hand made love, a last minute one. Hope he loves it. So did abit of camwhore here and there.
I really got nice assistant manager who helped me and guide along the way, therefore i'm thankful for his help.
Next week Joycee going Thailand!!! = I'm all alone @ night...sob sob. BUT got SHERYL...so not too lonely and Su En gonna's visit me. Awesome. I appreciate this grp of pals who are there by my side. I'm thankful. And today i went to Royce with George, the champagne chocolates are awesome, so bought some for Fuzzy and Betty....of course my dear lenny and phyone i brought macaroon and cookies for you tooo!!! Su en this wed i treat you okay my dear. I LOVE ROYCE..you get to eat chocolates and it just makes you happy.

That's it for today folkes...TMR gt SCHOOL!!


You + Me = FADZ IDA

Time for a Getaway.

Each time i looked at Happy family. I envy, i envy much. I wonder when will i have that feeling. When? when i about to die? It saddens me dramatically. I wish i had a happy family. Sometimes, my family find it hard to understand each other and then they will start quarelling with each other. I Hate that moment the most. I hate it when my mum and small sis had to break down because of that. My mum is under-going PMS. I rather go out everyday so that i can avoid that. It brings me down. I got a father who only thinks about himself, he doesn't bother about anyone in the family. A father who doesn't remember my birthday and stuffs. A father who does not bother me. I want a getaway. Far far away. It at least makes me happy and i can't wait for December holidays! I'm going Phuket with Fuzzy. It really helps me to unwind myself. Thanks for the air ticket. Love you much and always Fuzzy. I'm thankful for everything.

You + Me = FADZ IDA

UPDATES

Back to blogging, i had to cause FUZZY the WUZZY bear pestering me and don't know that i got blog fanatic.
I love my relationship life, thanks Dear for being there. Already missing you.

I love my all time favorite school bestie ENNIE SCREAMER. Thanks for all the help, we managed to stick it through the thin and thick and it seems like you're the only one in school who understands me other than Fuzzy. Of course the girls, but we just need bonding.

Updates:

Hmmm... Thursday Amazing Race? excited SO-SO la. Girls don't get me wrong. At first i was Excited!!! But then when i heard it was from the fitness, okay it became turned off. Those FT people always gt something up in their sleeves. That's why la.

Napfa next week...ooo lalalalalala. 2.4km....looking forward, neh not really. Im going to get burnt. Fuzzy Pls go jogging with me from Redhill to Pasir Ris. Hehes. Cheryl so sorry if i didn't head to the gym today, i need to do meetings for projects. Sorry some other day okay.

I want to thank my grp members for being patient, haha i know imma bitch but all i want for you guys is to excel and get A..let's do it baby!!...Syaz you're doing good as a new member, im proud of you. Nanthini Oh my AWESOMENESS. Haha, i always disturb you but you pull through my jokes and sarcasm...what more can i say. Thanks for doing the work on time despite your preparation for Deepavali. Lenny, thanks for helping me in my parts, i appreciate it so so much. Girls power is Awesome! Keep up the good work. Im sorry if i ever hurt you guys, you should know me i don't mean it for sure.

And of course the rest of the girls!!! Let's have a better forwarded cheerful relationship ahead!

You + Me = FADZ IDA

Seriously you must be Kidding

Time Check 2.21am.

What the hell am i doing right now when i'm supposed to sleep. Well i need to say this. Last 2 days me and Fuzzy went Queensway. This is funny. I was happily heading to the shop to collect the class t-shirt and then...kuang kuang kuang. The shop closed and burnt... i was seriously devastated. Its funny but at the same time disappointing. My girls and mates are hoping for the shirts even i am...we need it for the freaking projects. I just think October is full of sadness and disapointment, back in my home town Indo, people are killed bcos of volcano larva. How sad? In my work place, adeline and michael left how sad. Both of them are such nice colleagues to work with. And October, only if it was a fresh start for school and then quarrellings happened. I wish i had a fresh and a good start of November. I don't want it to happen again. Pls oh god. So yeah i got the letter from the Owner who is going to give us the refund and stuffs and i guess NO class T-shirts. Fuzzy wanted to sponsor from another shop but i said NO cause i hate to see bitches using the same shirts as me. Maybe there's one of the reason, all of the T-shirts got burnt. But its pretty sad bcos i want to see the girl putting on it with the Muay thai boxers that i bought. Haiz....so unfated. Getting the refund in 3 weeks time. Sorry LCrians...i didnt expect this to happened. Maybe it happened for a reason. 

Anyway, weekends was Shity but Halloween was Awesome with colleagues @ work, Joyce and Sheryl thanks for the company and Fuzzy thanks for the night out. I want to go out for a drink on deepavali....haiz stress ah....P to HYONE.... text me oiii....miss you loads, James and Peeps heading Harry's so do tag along. 

I want things to work out rite this time. Yes ah! Mon, Tue & Thurs OFF!!! I can go out!!! Fuzzy i blogged already. Nites and kisses to people from outside. Ta and Good night!!

You + Me = FADZ IDA

Happy 1st month anniversary.

Happy 1 month Anniversary Sayang!

I had the most wonderful anniversary ever, thanks for all the sweet gifts fuzzy.

Thanks for being there the moment when i need you, the times when i'm going to fall, I appreciate everything.

 26 Sept 2010. 

I hearts Fadzli Rani

You + Me = FADZ IDA

Ne-Yo - One In A Million

Song dedication to Fuzzy and My girls.
Thanks for everything. You guys are one in a million

You + Me = FADZ IDA

Hey peeps back from posting...I lost a friend. How do i feel? angry? devastated? broken-hearted?
Sometimes is like a replay, playing back in my head. All your actions. I'm all so sad but i want you to know i respect your decision, i have my own reasons for giving up on you. I going to put my head held up high, i won't be bothered with the comments you post on FB, like you said i'm no one important. After all i did to help you, i'm being called a mean bitch, how awesome is that. Is like a smack on my forehead. Thanks!

You ruined my Monday & Tuesday. I hope karma will hit you back on your forehead too. I better end this topic. Is stupid to talk about it.

Schools already re-open for 3 weeks how fast it that? And then i got surprises SO EARLY. 2 projects, 1 role-play, 2 shity problems held up in my head.
I hope i'm able to solve my problems, i don't want to think about it, I want it to VANISHED in thin air. Please, why is it still in my head. Feeling guilty but i shall not say it.

Haiz, today never come to school. Sick and i have major migraine acting up. I'm seeing double vision and doctor ask me to wear specs. I still can see without specs. I hate wearing specs.

Anyway Fuzzy thanks for cheering me up same goes for the girls. Thank you i appreciate. I hope this won't happen again. Fuzzy you are such a great boyfie, thanks for sharing my feelings and making me feel happy.












You + Me = FADZ IDA

Its all wasted

I knew you from the very started, our friendship and all...wasted.
I thought you knew me well, but it ended in the beginning... when it comes to this kind of situation, is always me who is to be blames...maybe i need to learn to self-pity myself first to be like you. Give you a chance, how many chances i give you already. You made me feel like i made a huge mistake a grave one. Forgive myself for my silly ethics. Is me or it is just you. One way to live life it to self pity yourself and love yourself before others.


You + Me = FADZ IDA

Cause i got Over you.

Everything is OFFICIALLY OVER. Hmm. how do i feel? better or worse? the truth is, it pains me to see me and him seperated. My feelings is still there, after 1 year 6 months of relationship and sacrifices, it meant the whole world to me.

My classmates are so curious why i get over it so fast, because i don't want to wait for another miracle to happened. I want me to do it not miracle. Fate brought us together. You make me smile and never make me cry. 3 weeks of relationship already. This 16th will be our 1st month anniversary. Excited? Neh not really, what matters is you. I appreciate those shoulders i cried on when i need it.
3 words to describe my feelings for you I LOVE YOU!. May i hope our relationship last forever and good luck in YOUR EXAMS!! those 3 words save my life. I don't like showing my status on FB, cause i think is crapped. So sorry Fuzzy:D just not the right time. But that doesn't mean i don't hearts you. Hehes.

Anyway SCHOOL REOPENED! GUESS WHAT! My time table sucks, i will prone more to inadequate sleep bcos of 8am schedule. Haiz and also end so late! After that work and fuzzy never fail to send me home. Thanks!

WORK- JAVA DETOUR
 How awesome it is to work for your passion on something, its has always been my dream of making good coffee to customers. I love it. My work is AWESOME and JOYCEE AND MIKE too. Cheryl and George the funny poly peeps always have some issues and bitchy notes to talk about. Love it. JOYCEE gonna put me in-charge night next week. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

MOOD- HELL YEAH I SO EFFING TIRED
Work and study is both important, i'm learning to juggle so bear with me ya:D  I want to do well in both. I don't care about the lack of sleep. All i care is i want to do well in Career and Studies to be somebody in future. I've been going to work after school= so so so so tired but worth it!

LOOKING THIS ON BRIGHT SIDE

I want to be grateful for the little things and i HOPE Allah will give me a chance to live a better and fruitful life. My prioritise is studies and family but on the other hand work. I want to take little chances to be myself and have FUN with my babes in school and of course get back on track and chased after my 4.0 gpa in Nitec! though it sounds a bit impossible imma make it a little bit reasonable and put it as 3.7. You can do it WAHIDAH!








Me + You =

LPD project was a fruitful one:D

I'm really grateful for having group members that are so hardworking in putting this project a SUCCESSFUL one. I must thank FIDIANA, LENNY, SERI...SYAZ- THE TINKIPONKIE. Awesome. I almost cry. I couldn't held my tears back. When that granny pull my hands to give me a hug & kiss...i really aw that moment. I was speechless, lost for words. When i told the granny @9.30 we need to go back, she burst into tears, i felt guilty but if i should leave or not. I never see my grandma for ages, since primary school so when i get the warmth of her love it really aw me. I learnt alot, things that i couldn't buy & read from the book. I don't like to see people crying, esp the ones that i love. I know the agony that they've been through, how strong & noble a person can be. I really love that Granny, i don't know why i'm getting emotional, but right now i'm really crying. Tears just flow. I hate it when she said, she don't know when Allah want to take her soul away, i hate it. Pls, oh pls don't say that. I pray for your well-being. You are such a nice person, really a nice lady. Mak Cik Asiah. Thank you for everything. For your contribution towards making this project a successful one. You're really cool when we snapped photos with you, neither did you scold us for taking photos of your home. I'm grateful so grateful. I want to meet her again. Next month, we girls going to give her a surprise visit. Hopefully it will be a pleasant one. Dear Allah, thanks for bringing me closer to people who need more help than me, thank you for proving the best of my ability, Thank you for giving me a chance to fulfill her wishes during the project. Thank you for making me run this project smooth & safely. I want to experience this all again, and this time. I want my whole class to feel the warmth of an elderly which i don't think you can ever feel, buy, or sell.


Me + You = IdaSyar

I miss my past.

I never LOVE someone so deeply before.  I remember the 1st day of school when i 1st saw you. That is the moment i've been waiting for. To be with you. Yes to be with you. I'm grateful that you let me love you. I know i'm not your best GF ever but i may be in future. You're my freAking best. I admit.

I really miss doing one thing that i really love when i was in NITEC. Playing ultimate frisbee with ethel. And also my team Phantom Disc. I love that team. I don't know why i quit that team, maybe i was just being harsh. I'm having mixed feelings about it. I wish i was playing for your team. Colin, i really let you down.











Me + You = IdaSyar